What Should You Do if Ou Know Someone Who Was Raped

What Exercise I Do/Say If Someone Tells Me That They Accept Been Sexually Assaulted

Note from the Author: This commodity was originally written for Sexual Assault Awareness Month. Below are 7 things that you tin do to support someone who tells you that they have been assaulted, raped, or driveling. This past no means is an all-inclusive resource and boosted resource can be found at RAINN and theEvery Woman's Place.

If you are looking for immediate support for yourself or someone you lot know, nosotros encourage you lot to visit RAINN and the Every Woman'southward Place.

If yous accept questions about the article below you lot can e-mail me directly at bednarchik@campuspeak.com

  • Mind without judging. Being told that someone has been assaulted can be an extremely emotional, scary, confusing, and possibly shocking feel for both you and the other person. One of the best things that you can practice is to listen. Surprisingly, listening is not the easiest affair to do. Often we want to ask questions, testify outrage, or offer advice. Though y'all may have the all-time intentions, whatever or all of these could come beyond to the victim as judgment (due east.g., that the assail was their fault, that they did something wrong, etc.). In addition, these shift the focus away from the person who is telling you about their attack.Effective and supportive listening includes nonverbal communication such as nodding, engaging in eye contact with the other person, shifting your body to face them, leaning toward them, etc. Refrain from touching the other person unless they give you permission. Following a traumatic experience, this gesture of comfort could be upsetting or unwanted by the other person.
  • Let the person know that the attack/rape or abuse was not their error. Nobody deserves to exist sexually assaulted/raped or abused…no matter what they were wearing, how much they drank, how they were dancing, even if they were flirting or went to his/her room with them, if they had a previous romantic or sexual relationship, how late they stayed out, who they got a ride from, etc. etc. etc.  Being sexual assaulted, raped, or abused is never the victim'south error.Some things that you could say include, "This was not your fault," "You did not do anything wrong," or "Zippo you did acquired this to happen to you lot."
  • Reassure the person that they are cared for and loved, and that you will do your best to provide unconditional support. This could include helping the person observe and get access to campus resources such as counseling, medical attention or reporting. Your campus website is a good place to outset. Try using key words such equally, "Health Services," Health Promotion," "Title Nine," or "sexual assail support."Communicating your back up can be as simple as proverb, "I care about y'all," "I dear y'all, and want to help you in any way that I can," or "I am hither for yous no matter what you need."
  • Encourage the person to seek medical attending. Your friend's safety should be a primary business concern. Regardless of whether they want to report the set on, they can (and should) still receive a medical exam. This might include physical injuries, STI/STD tests, emergency contraception, post exposure prophylaxis (if they retrieve they may have been exposed to HIV), pelvic, anal or oral exams, or a sexual assault forensic examination. Nigh colleges and universities offer medical resources to students, or y'all tin can encourage them to get to the infirmary or local Planned Parenthood health centre (or a local rape crisis center).Here are some things you can say to your friend: "I am worried about your health and safety, why don't we effigy out how to get you checked out by a doctor," "I feel like it is of import to brand sure that you lot are okay physically.  Would you like me to go with y'all to encounter a md?" or "I don't want anything bad to happen to you. How well-nigh nosotros figure out how to go you lot in to run across a doctor just to make certain you are okay?"
  • If the assail merely happened, assistance the person preserve bear witness. They exercise not have to decide right abroad if they want to talk to the police or printing charges against the person who assaulted them, only just in case they do, it is important for them to take precautions to preserve any evidence that may take been left behind later on the attack. This includes not showering or brushing their teeth. If possible, they should non go to the bath, eat, drinkable, smoke, or comb their hair. If they desire to alter their clothes, exist sure not to wash the clothes, and put them in a chocolate-brown paper pocketbook and bring them with you when yous see a nurse or doctor.Don't know how to bring this up? Effort these: "I know all yous want to practice is shower, but perhaps you should wait until nosotros see a doctor. There might be evidence that could be used later if you decide to report," or "I know y'all said you aren't sure if you want to report, and that'southward fine. I encourage you to consider non showering and bringing the clothes you were wearing with yous when we come across a doctor. This could help preserve evidence if you make up one's mind to written report later."
  • Encourage (do not strength) the person to written report the assault. Sexual set on is a offense, and they have the right to report what happened to them to the police—but only if they want to. If they do decide to report, yous can offer to exist there with them when they do.What do yous say? Endeavor: "What happened to you is a crime, and you can report this to the police force if you want to," "If y'all want to report what happened to you to the police, I will be here with you every step of the manner," or " If is up to you if you lot want to study this to the police.  Do y'all want to talk almost how you lot feel most this?"
  • BELIEVE them! If y'all do nothing else, you can do this—you tin believe your friend. The arraign for what happened is on the person who committed the assault, Non on the victim.Some simple things that yous can say include: "I believe you lot, and I desire to help you," "I am so sorry this happened to you," or "I have no thought what to say, but I want to aid you through this.  What can I do?"

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Source: https://campuspeak.com/say-someone-tells-sexually-assaulted/

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